Ragging Moments

A group of seniors got hold of me and asked to tell them “The Hare and Tortoise story”, I thought that should be easy and then would escape from them. Ask me, after a good five hours, why I couldn't even start the race of the hare and tortoise. The questions that I had to answer!

1) Who was the rabbit     2) what was his name   3) What was the gender    4) where did it live   5) did rabbit use cosmetics 6) Is tortoise female if so was it carrying 7) where was the jungle is it Wi-Fi enabled 8) who conducted the race which committee? 9) Names and colors of the trees in the jungle 10) who were the audience?

Boy, I was huffing and puffing for air as if I myself had taken part in some marathon



After that when I said them I am hungry, to quench my thirst they asked me to make love to a tree , that is how I expressed myself for the first time to a living organism called Peepal tree. Emerging relatively unscathed from hugging, cuddling and smooching the tree, my next task was to play cricket in the cafeteria's approach road

Sounds simple?

Try playing it by yourself, where you are the bowler who goes to the top of the run up, run down and bowl, run to the other end of the wicket and bat, run to the boundary region as the fielder to collect the ball and throw it in, run back to behind the imaginary wickets to play the wicketkeeper, run to the other end to become the umpire giving the batsman out, go back to the other end and start walking back to the pavilion

Then I was told to recite a poem on not ‘The undertaker’ but ‘The underwear’,

Wrinkle wrinkle, little cloth
Now I wonder where you are
Deep below inside you hide
Like a butter you will slide
Wrinkle wrinkle, little cloth
Now I wonder where you are

Then a series of such things followed that were both hilarious and ridiculous. Night after night, as soon as we returned from college, some of us would become prey to a senior vampire

I when once relented was kept standing under bathroom-shower throughout the night, wearing clothes and shoes, as time progressed we specialized in Swimming on the floor, skipping without rope, snake dance, pole dance, cabaret any more…..

There was certain naming convention to students in my college :

When u are a male fresher in your first year--- faccha ,
in second year u will be promoted as baccha ,
and then later designation changes to bada bachha ,
finally in the 4th year become the man who matters the baap.

Similary for girls it would be facchi, bacchi, baadi bacchi and Maa.

By the time we graduated we all became maaa---- baaaps in the class.

But the irony was that there was mad race for female offspring’s on campus

Every faccha wanted a facchi
Every baccha desired a bacchi
Each bada baccha needed a bada bacchi
And after every maa there were at least 4 different baaaps.

Another category existed for girls they were rated in order of feelings

if you thought OK –the she was referred as DAAL

if you say WOW then – she is a MAAAL ,

When your saliva is drooping from the mouth – then it is KAMAAL

And if 2 eyes are not enough to handle the hotness -- DHAMAAL
If you get a dhamaal then u become MAALA MAAL.

One day when I became baap, I saw a dhamaal l in a body hugging skin tight yellow dress, I called her( using whistle) to salute me , she smiled at me

I thought I was going to get a MAA for my bacchas ,and I already short listed the honeymoon destinations

When I was in the class , suddenly the yellow dressed girl came into the class and announced ,

“good morning students, I am I am samsakara , and I shall be handling this class”
That is when my all honeymoon were converted into acidmoon.

 
Ragging brought into us more creativity, removed our shyness and helped us to know more about ourselves.

It was all done in the spirit of fun, and the underlying principle was familiarization. Like “One peg whisky makes you fit”, limited amount of ragging can make you a strong Man.

Today after so many years I still laugh my lungs out whenever there is any remote reference made to a hare and tortoise,peepal tree, yellow dress, pole dance.

I believe “Everybody laughs in the same language” and If I were not be allowed to laugh in heaven, I don't want to go there either”


I almost got married then, but after 6 years I have one last thing to say

One peg of whisky full ya quarter , PLEASE
Don’t say this speech to my wife or daughter.

 My Ragging Moments video